My wife gets all the money I make. I just get an apple and clean clothes every morning.

Next quotes

• Ray Romano:

  I love standup and I haven't given it up.

• Ray Romano:

  Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world. But they are also terrorists. Yo

• Ray Romano:

  It seems to be a common denominator with a lot of comics, this low self-esteem thing.

• Ray Romano:

  Right after 'Raymond' I had a world-is-my-oyster attitude, but I found out I don't like oysters. I

• Ray Romano:

  It's my insecurity that makes me want to be a comic, that makes me need the audience.

• Ray Romano:

  I've always wondered, what am I going to do that's important with these stupid jokes that I tell.

• Ray Romano:

  I'm always giving myself the Alzheimer's test. My shrink told me to do this. It takes one minute. Y

• Ray Romano:

  I still feel like an immature idiot inside, but I look in the mirror and - as a friend of mine once

• Ray Romano:

  Each day it's like: 'How many more days am I going to feel young and vibrant? I feel young and vibr

• Ray Romano:

  I don't want to be a spokesman for family values, but that's the way my standup is perceived.