Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs.

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• P. J. O'Rourke:

  President Bush said that if illegal immigrants want citizenship, they'd have to do three things: pa

• P. J. O'Rourke:

  Nobody is making Americans buy Chinese goods.

• P. J. O'Rourke:

  I look around my house, and everything except the kids and dogs was made in China. And I'm not sure

• P. J. O'Rourke:

  Chinese economic development has cost many American workers their jobs. That's the price of progres

• P. J. O'Rourke:

  Like most sensible people, you probably lost interest in modern art about the time that Julian Schn

• P. J. O'Rourke:

  It could be that all awful dictators are frustrated artists - Mao with his poetry and Mussolini wit

• P. J. O'Rourke:

  America is not doctrinaire. It's hard for an American politician to come up with an ideological pos

• P. J. O'Rourke:

  Corporate corruption has ecological merits. It's helping to preserve that species known as Democrat

• P. J. O'Rourke:

  Are you a Democrat because you're a union member? Then why, after eight years of Bill Clinton, does

• P. J. O'Rourke:

  If you want to join the Republican party, they have to let you in. There's nothing they can do abou