Why a four-year-old child could understand this report. Run out and find me a four-year-old child. I can't make head nor tail out of it.

Next quotes

• Groucho Marx:

  I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.

• Groucho Marx:

  A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.

• Groucho Marx:

  I must say I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I go to the library

• Groucho Marx:

  I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.

• Groucho Marx:

  There's one way to find out if a man is honest - ask him. If he says, 'Yes,' you know he is a crook

• Groucho Marx:

  Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does.

• Groucho Marx:

  Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.

• Groucho Marx:

  From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Someday

• Groucho Marx:

  I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room an

• Groucho Marx:

  I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.