Comedian Quotes and aphorisms about why not George Carlin Pat Paulsen Nicole Byer Stephen Colbert Julia Sweeney Dane Cook James Veitch ,, I woke up one morning to an email from my friend Alex that said she'd had her bag stolen. Ordinaril... Jack Dee ,, If I'm pushed, I'd also have to admit I don't like people with allergies. They just annoy me. There... Pat Paulsen Lewis Black