I predict one of these two teams will win the Super Bowl.

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• Gilbert Gottfried:

  I have always felt comedy and tragedy are roommates. If you look up comedy and tragedy, you will fi

• Gilbert Gottfried:

  In real life I'm a tall, blond Christian.

• Gilbert Gottfried:

  One thing I can take credit for, along with the rest of show business, is when the red ribbons were

• Gilbert Gottfried:

  I don't know if I change my act from century to century. Sometimes I'm onstage doing imitations and

• Gilbert Gottfried:

  There definitely is exposure in reality shows, but the exposure will basically get you more reality

• Gilbert Gottfried:

  If you're a lead actor, people are just waiting to say 'you're too old' or 'you're too unhip.' If y

• Gilbert Gottfried:

  I would show up at a party for Al Qaeda if you said there's going to be a dinner.

• Gilbert Gottfried:

  You never know what people will choose to be offended by.

• Gilbert Gottfried:

  I'd make Jack Benny look like a philanthropist.

• Gilbert Gottfried:

  I was the class podiatrist. I never made it to class clown. I wasn't funny enough. I would examine