People say I owe a lot to television. The fact is I was a star long before television. What TV made me is unemployed.

Next quotes

• Milton Berle:

  I received a lot of complaints from parents who wrote and told me that their kids wouldn't go to sl

• Milton Berle:

  There's a difference between being a comic and a comedian. A comic is a guy who says funny things,

• Milton Berle:

  My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years o

• Milton Berle:

  They've finally comes up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another

• Milton Berle:

  A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

• Milton Berle:

  Money can't buy you happiness, but it helps you look for it in a lot more places.

• Milton Berle:

  I have a file of four million jokes... I have them cross-indexed. Whatever subject you want, I have

• Milton Berle:

  Now a 'funnyman' can get a laugh before opening his mouth - looking funny. Lou Costello was one of

• Billy Sunday:

  More men fail through lack of purpose than lack of talent.

• Billy Sunday:

  If there is no hell, a good many preachers are obtaining money under false pretenses.